You look different. People act different.

I've had a think about this topic/theme, whatever you like to call it for a few weeks. I've been stewing over the idea to actually get a grip and shove all my feelings about it into a post i.e chatting shit and thought now is my chance.

To get things straight, when I'm talking about looking 'different', I am referring to when someone has a unusual look, the visible appearance of someone. Some would say the shallow parts of a person cause here's a fact, looks don't stick around for long. God knows why people at school always use to get het up about their looks. Babe, give it another 20 years and looks will be lumped aside and then you are gonna have to fix up the bland personality you had all those years ago which you brushed aside to make sure you could get the attention of the 'fittest' guy in sixth form. Hope it worked out for the both of you cause I bet ya bottom dollar the 'relationship' lasted two weeks tops and then the ship had sailed between ya both. But anyway you get the jist. Basically not looking like every tom, dick or harry. I know people say 'oh but everyone is different in looks' and yeah they are damn right but at the same time there is definitely a certain look for the gals and guys that make it in the 'popular group' and so on for all the other groups schools stirred into a pot.

Personally I love that I look a bit different. Got the unusual look (split second thought of the Rimmel campaign 'get the london look'!) but I can tell ya for free that it has taken years for me to feel comfortable with people staring at me in the streets or making little remarks. Little ones asking 'why do I have chubby cheeks?, why is your nose like that?, why do I speak funny?' etc. When I was younger I was 100% convinced that people were staring cause I was a creep, ugly, not one of them. As I've grown up a wee lil bit, I have started to own the differences. I mean it's easier to not take offence quite as much if you add a little bit of sass and throw in some confidence to let it brush aside. I don't mind the questions quite so much as long as I have time to explain to young ones or people who stop and stare. To be honest my fave tactics for the keen starers is either to wave which makes them uncomfortable as shit to be able to respond or to walk away. I mean you do you but it seems to work. But like I said, I have only recently given less of two flying shits about it all. Most of the time you ain't gonna see them again so why worry. Majority of the time they are just intrigued about you or like a particular feature that isn't seen quite as much. For example, people stare a lot at my hair since I am a natural red head but it isn't just a carrot shade. It has a lot of different colours which people find intrigued as to whether it is natural. Yeah babes it is, I ain't got time to be whacking out the crayola colour palette on the regs.

Yeah I have started to give less of a fuck with how I look but there has been something recently that has grinded my gears. Got me frothing at the mouth. Maybe not that dramatic but ya know, gotta do it for the effect kids. It has been playing on my mind recently that especially with adults, when they first have an encounter with me, whether it's for a quick chat or in supermarkets buying a 2 for 70p on kitkats at lunchtime, I feel that people instantly start to talk to me in a different tone and are reserved until I open my gob and they realise that just cause I have a different look does not mean that I have a learning impairment. You gotta laugh at it cause for a split second once they realise that I can chat shit for days and like to have a laugh, their faces just hit rock bottom. It's an absolute crack. Yeah I get that I have a loud personality and sometimes I get people might just think that I have been let out on day release, I totes allow that. What I do not allow is when people instantly judge based entirely on your visible looks. I mean, what a joke that it is something that shallow. To be honest, it is more sad to see that some people in today's society do become friends or only speak to people that they feel are acceptable based on their appearance rather than on their personality. It don't rub clear on my girl. I ain't got time for superficial friendships and relationships. I would much rather a good ol' crack up in the local, exercising my cheeks from cry laughing with a best pal rather than go on the hunt for someone who is only there for the gram, takes their looks way too seriously but if truth be told has a face like a slapped arse and a personality which makes staring at wet paint more fun. I just think less of speaking slowly, being disengaged in the convo or just being damn right rude about the looks you give and be more open to speaking to everyone, ask the question if you are intrigued by someone and do the simplest thing which is just be kind. It goes a long way. I would much rather people ask questions rather than dish out dirty looks which could slice ya in half. Least they want to learn and to understand. It is manners and funnily enough they don't cost a penny.

What I am trying to say is do trust that cheesy old quote 'don't judge a book by it's cover'. What is staring, sniggering or veering away enitrely from speaking to someone who may stand out with their features gonna do? It is gonna make that person feel like absolute dog shit and the other person carrying out the act isn't gonna learn anymore. They are more likely to become twisted in their thoughts and not gonna lie but jealousy don't look good on anyone babes. It's a grim trait and wouldn't wish it on my worse enemy. I just think at the end of the day, I will ask you if I want you speak in a certain way, slower in the speed you talk or pronounce things clearer, I just don't think it is nice to automatically assume that just cause I don't display 'average' facial features doesn't mean I have a problem with communication. People who know me know that communication is the least of ya worries babes, I can tell ya that. I mean what is 'average', god knows. 

At the end of the day, just be kind, ask questions and if someone really can't handle ya then do you really wanna surround ya self with people who suffer from such low self esteem and confidence that they have to drag everyone down to their level. Nah, it ain't worth it. Let a drainer be a drainer and leave them in the ditch. 

Cheers for the check in.

Speak soon,

love, T 

x

p.s soz babes for the pinterest pics, didn't have a wee chance to grab some insta pics to split this post up with! Hopefully just a one off. Anyway, enjoy!